I am fairly confident that none of my grammar teachers from high school or college would be thrilled with the title of this blog post, but it states the problem and the solution to my current dilemma so nicely that…eh, whatever.
I am sixty-four years old. Not ancient by today’s standards, but certainly not young either. If there is a robbery and the home’s occupant is a sixty-four year old person, the news reporters will refer to that person as “elderly.”
Elderly means lots of different things, I suppose. There are sixty-four year olds running marathons. There are sixty-four year olds climbing mountains, biking, hiking, all of those wonderful physical achievements that at one time were only associated with much younger folk. I, sadly, am not that “youngish in the sixties” kind of gal.
Almost ten years ago, I took a nasty tumble and did a real number on my back. It happens. You fall, and when you get back up, things in your life take a turn, I still manage most things, but I can no longer pretend that there are marathons and mountain climbing in my future. I wish there were those adventures ahead for me, but, probably not. Truth be told, the grocery store can be a marathon for me on some days.
The deal is…ugh, gasp, choke…that I am actually considering getting a cane. Sigh. How can that even be? Forget the whole “aging gracefully” thing, this is hard. I once told my beautiful daughter that I did not want to be defined by my stupid, rotten, no good, very bad back. Won’t using the can just solidify my being a “not cool in her sixties loser?”
I am a “boomer” and we naively thought that we were never going to age, dumb, dumb, dumb. We foolishly thought that by the sheer force of our will that we could stave off the ravages of aging. Again, dumb. Good Lord, I still wear my hair long, and dress in jeans about 95% of the time. How did I become an “elderly” woman?
So, at some point soon, my sweet man and I are going to go “cane shopping.” Just try that in a sentence about yourself. Ugh. Just thinking this cane better be gorgeous, have to go well with my jeans, right?